Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Oh Amazon, how did you know?

If only my life were as interesting as Amazon and Tivo seem to think it is when they make "suggestions" for me.

A few weeks ago, I bought a pair of handcuffs from Amazon to use as a kind of cafĂ© lock for my bikes.  The whole transaction was smooth, fast and successful.  I've already moved on to new projects and ideas.

Amazon, though, isn't ready for the fun to end.  They found my purchase intriguing, and have helpfully tried to find other products I might enjoy.  Take a look at what showed up in my "other items you might like" box this morning.

 Seriously.  Right there next to Sunlite inner tubes and Crane bells and whatnot sat this, uh, item.

Naturally, I clicked on it to have a closer look.  (If you're an Amazon user, you're ahead of me at this point and know where this is headed.) Yep, I had now  changed the equation on another feature, the "items you've looked at recently" box.  By the time I got back to Schwalbe tires, my suggestions included a number of intriguing, horrifying, mysterious and wince-inducing products I will not show here.  I will say only that I had no idea there existed such a variety of dilators, riding crops and speculums (specula?) on our planet. 

So, I've pretty much convinced Amazon that I'm that dude from the basement of the pawn shop in Pulp Fiction.  Nice day's work.


  1. Hahahaha this is hilarious!!! I guess I'll just start calling you Zed.